TSR: Trust, Respect, and Sincerity

on Trust...

How do you trust a person? Some says trust is too expensive to be given. Some asks for price. Some choose someone who can be trusted.

I could still recall what my cousin is always stressing about trust, 'Keep a friend and love him such, but never know him too much, because if a friend becomes a foe, your secrets, the whole world will know.' isn' that scary?

Well, for one, i am a person who easily trust someone whom i have had a talk for maybe a month. I mean whom i know not as much as i know my bestfriend. But i always keep in my mind that the choice is always been mine. The choice to have this person carry the burden of my trust. It is a burden to that person, especially if it is a secret. As i was saying, trusting a person is a choice, you can never ask someone if you can trust him/her because it is you who has the nerve to give trust to that person. It is now up to the person being trusted what he/she is going to do, what he/she is choosing to do with the trust. It is becomes the person's choice what to do with the trust you have given him/her. Do not blame the person if he/she betrays you, it would be better if you are not going to see that person again, to avoid violence or whatsoever.

As you may have noticed, it is all about choices. If the other person is a keen chooser then i guess you have made a right choice of whom to trust. This is what I usually do, I have to make it a point to know if the person i am about to be trusted knows how to rightly choose even in smallest situations, like buying things, choosing places to hang out, etc.

You may use a lot of technique like me but still, it all boils down to one thing: choice.


on Respect...

We used to hear from our parents to respect older people. If you're older than I am, you will have my respect. Do you really need to be respected?

Conflict and misunderstanding arises when one of the parties do not respect the position of the other party. Expect quarrel, bad words, skyrocketting-objects, punching and even death. War is the worst of them all. People not respecting other people, people not respecting others' faith and beliefs and principles. Respect is not as costly as trust. Respect can be easily given without you yourself getting hurt.

Why do people older than i do needed respect? How about the younger once? It is like in the workplace, when someone who is in the higher position than you, you are expected to respect that person. Is it acceptable? Well, it has become a norm. Everyone is exercising it. But of course, respect can be taken away once our morale is damaged. Like when i used to work as a lecturer in a school, I was really irritated by my boss everytime she shouts at my fellow lecturers (I must admit I haven't been shouted by her). Some of them cries and some leave their work and never come back again. Back when I got the job, I was able to appreciate everything my boss has done for the school but as time goes by everything changes. The place becomes a jungle where my boss is the lion and we are my boss' preys. With the situation, I have decided to quit before I loss my temper on my boss.

Sometimes it is hard for me take back the respect I have given because respect is so important that it becomes the reason many misunderstands, even war. The war in iraq is the effect of "unrespect" because two or more people do not respect one another. If you value respect, let is flow through everyone, a small amount of respect can give this world a peaceful turn.

Here's a scenario where trust is very much neeeded. There were two people (A & B) who works on the same organization and has been quite fine dealing with each other, almost to the point of being bestfriends. In an unfortunate circumstances, the other party (B) failed to keep the closeness that they had established. Then there is another person, a third party (C), who wishes to make things right (which C thinks) for both parties. Nevertheless, both parties (A & B) fix what has been broken, sins has been forgiven, but the closeness can never be back again. A says that since they belong to the same league, A would better act as civil and professional as possible, and stresses that this is all A could offer B. B agrees and believes that what has been can never be restored, at least B could still talk to A. Upon hearing the arrangement, C thinks that it is all bullshit and unacceptable. So C wanted more than what the 2 parties has agreed. Isn't C should respect the decision of the 2 involved? C has just stepped into the area where C should not be, invading what A & B know belongs to them. C never respect their stands and worst of all added insult to the injury.

Respect is so simple that it can create a harmonious atmosphere between all of us.


On Sincerity...

Need I say more? Isn't lies acceptable? When in doubt? Some of us used the world 'jamming' or 'ride on' to emphasis that saying the things been said is because we just want to make an impression to a certain person.

How sincere are we when we deal with our angst, our emotions, our thoughts? According to dictionary.com sincerity means as the quality or condition of being sincere; genuineness, honesty, and freedom from duplicity. Quality is how good you mean the things you say or do. It follows that even if you are honest, you have to check if your honesty has quality. Condition is how do you feel your being genuine. On our latest team-building seminar, our facilitator refers sincerity to where your thought and feelings come from, if it is from your heart, that is sincerity. I do agree and this is the only way we can be able to weigh our being sincere.

Sincerity comes when you trust and respect someone. Trust and respect go along with sincerity because it is the measurement of how much you mean to trust and respect a person. You can respect a person without trust but not without sincerity, same way that you can trust a person without respect but not without sincerity but would it be better if you respect and trust someone with sincerity?

I'm out!